Frank City Film Club – Episode Six

Brian Snuff – Eating the face off cinema theory

If I were filming my life it would have a Talk Talk soundtrack. It would be shot in celluloid because digital couldn’t do a Talk Talk soundtrack justice. I don’t think I’d film my life though. There is little epic about twenty-something procrastinations. Unless you count This Life, but that was TV.

BANE: You dyed your hair. It looks stupid.

KES: Thanks.

NIKITA:  I watched Wings of Desire last night. Do they think black & white with subtitles stops it being a creepy stalker movie?

SNUFTY: I liked the bit with Nick Cave.

NIKITA: I liked the bit with Nick Cave.

Subtext: If I was an angel, I would stalk Nikita.

BANE: Is that why you like it, Snufty? Cos you’re a creepy stalker?

Sometime Bane has the subtlety of a parma violet.

SNUFTY: I’ve never expressed like for it.

BANE: You never express like for anything. You just discuss the issues.

NIKITA: The fact that they can hear internal thoughts is even creepier. I never walk along the bloody street thinking profound things or mourning lost love. I’m either thinking about eating something, hurting someone or how many pints it would take me to sleep with whatever hipster scum is walking the other way.

BANE: You love hipster scum.

NIKITA: It’s the ironic mustaches that get me going.

JEANIE: I was walking down the street yesterday. I saw a wrapper on the ground. I picked it up because it was a nice colour.

A short silence follows this.

NIKITA: Are you about to say something profound, or was that the whole story?

SNUFTY: Imagine if an angel was stalking Jeanie and listening to her thoughts.

Jeanie looked up at me from beneath a dark, child-like fringe. I wondered for a second if she was offended but her eyes changed focus again, as though my words were only elevator jazz.

JEANIE: This guy was walking the other way. I think I know him. I think he asked for my phone number one time. He said “what are you doing?” So I told him it was a pretty colour. He asked if I was stoned. Then he said he knew Marie.

NIKITA: Who is Marie?

JEANIE: You know, the one who was out at the Social that night with no pants on?

NIKITA: Ah, Frou-frou von Fresh. Pray continue…

Kes was sat at the table, his chin rested on his arms.

JEANIE: Don’t you think it’s weird that he’d say that?

NIKITA: Were you thinking about Marie-with-no-pants at the time? Was he mind-reading?

JEANIE: No, I don’t think so.

This is a classic Jeanie conversation, no beginning, middle or end. Just a vague meandering. This is what Kes can’t handle. Bane decides it’s appropriate to escape the fluffy clouds.

BANE: Why did you dye your hair, Kes? Are you having a mid-twenties life crisis.

KES: My friend is making an Anime-style stop-motion. He wants to take digital photographs of me & then draw over the top…

BANE: Can’t he colour your hair in the pictures?

KES: I was getting in character.

NIKITA: Method Man.

SHUFTY: Are we gonna do some work or just shoot the shit all night?

JEANIE: Oh, I had an idea about scene eight…

BANE: If you’re having ideas I’m gonna need a beer.


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